Schmidt gives Jess a harsh pep talk on how to hide her 'crazy' and land a rebound, while Nick offers cynical commentary on his methods.
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SCHMIDT
Now listen to me. I know at some point someone in your life told you that it was okay to be exactly who you are and that one day you’d find a man who loves the real you- a man who just lives to rub on your hairy, hairy legs. That’s not going to be tonight. You’re going to take off that sweater, because it smells like apple sauce... And you’re…
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