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    duologue
    Comedy

    Deterring the Buyers

    from American Housewife

    Written by Sarah Dunn

    American Housewife

    Katie pitches a series of increasingly absurd and offensive ideas to Jeff to lower their neighborhood property value and prevent a friend from moving.

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    Scene PreviewExcerpt — subscribe to read full scene

    KATIE

    Okay, I’ve come up with a few ways to slow this whole Fat-Pam-leaving-town train down. To throw a wrench in the works, as it were. Number one. Rent out our junk room to one of those guys so we can get on that website everyone checks.

    JEFF

    The pedophilia website?

    KATIE

    I think they prefer the term ‘sex offender.’

    JEFF

    You want to put a child…

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    Scene Notes & Audition Tips

    5 sections
    About This Scene

    Written by Sarah Dunn for the television comedy American Housewife, this contemporary two-minute duologue captures the chaotic energy of modern suburban life. Relaxing on the couch together, Katie presents her husband Jeff with an escalating list of wildly inappropriate schemes designed to tank their local property values and keep a friend from moving away. The piece thrives on rapid-fire banter and absurdist humor, offering a sharp, funny snapshot of an unconventional marriage.

    Character Analysis

    Katie is an unapologetic, fiercely determined schemer who approaches neighborhood dilemmas with audacious confidence and virtually no social filter. She fully commits to her outrageous proposals, relying on high personal conviction and relentless persistence to push past any initial pushback. Jeff serves as her deadpan anchor, functioning as the dry, grounded voice of reason who patiently deflects her most extreme ideas until he offers a collaborative twist of his own.

    Why This Works for Auditions

    This selection is exceptional for demonstrating snappy comedic rhythm, verbal agility, and active partner listening within a compact running time. It allows an actor to deliver boundary-pushing jokes while keeping the character likable, grounded, and rooted in recognizable domestic reality. The escalating list format also provides unmistakable comedic beats, letting both actors highlight crisp comedic timing without falling into caricature.

    Best Suited For

    Tailored for actors playing in their thirties to mid-forties, this scene is an outstanding fit for comedic leads, quirky character types, and grounded everyman performers. It is particularly well suited for self-tapes, agent showcases, and general television practice requiring an episodic sitcom style. Actors aiming to highlight their ease with contemporary domestic comedy will find the dynamic pairing especially beneficial.

    Performance Tips

    Ground the interaction in physical familiarity right from the opening moment to establish years of marital ease. The actor playing Katie must treat each outrageous suggestion with complete, earnest practicality rather than winking at the audience. For Jeff, the comedy lives in understated exhaustion and dry delivery; resist the urge to overreact, letting your silence and measured pace heighten the humor of Katie’s relentless momentum.

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