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    duologue
    Comedy

    Guess vs. Squeezer

    from The Proposal

    Written by Anton Chekhov

    After finally settling a land dispute, Natalya and Lomov immediately descend into a new, heated argument over whose hunting dog is superior.

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    Scene PreviewExcerpt — subscribe to read full scene

    LOMOV

    My heart’s palpitating awfully.... My foot’s gone to sleep.... There’s something keeps pulling in my side.

    NATALYA STEPANOVNA

    Forgive us, Ivan Vassilevitch, we were all a little heated.... I remember now: Oxen Meadows really are yours.

    LOMOV

    My heart’s beating awfully.... My Meadows.... My eyebrows are both twitching....

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    Scene Notes & Audition Tips

    5 sections
    About This Scene

    This classical comedic duologue comes from Anton Chekhov's farce, The Proposal. After barely recovering from a heated dispute over land ownership, Lomov and Natalya Stepanovna attempt to steer the conversation toward polite small talk about hunting. However, the moment their prized hunting dogs are mentioned, their stubbornness takes over and sparks an immediate, passionate debate over whether Guess or Squeezer is the superior hound.

    Character Analysis

    Lomov is an anxious, hypochondriacal landowner who is constantly besieged by physical twitches and heart palpitations, yet he remains relentlessly combative about his principles. Natalya Stepanovna is a sharp-witted, fiercely competitive young woman who tries to maintain social harmony, only to be overtaken by her pride the second her family's honour is challenged. Both characters are deeply stubborn, letting their obsessive need to be right completely derail their personal objectives.

    Why This Works for Auditions

    This scene offers exceptional material for paired actors looking to demonstrate rapid-fire comedic timing and high farcical stakes. It demands that performers play the absurd situation with utter sincerity, creating dynamic conflict from trivial domestic complaints. Audition panels and casting directors appreciate classical comedy that displays strong partner connection, physical specificity, and the ability to escalate an argument without losing comedic precision.

    Best Suited For

    This piece is ideal for drama school auditions, agent showcases, general practice, and acting competitions. It is particularly well suited for character actors, quirky performers, and comedic leads who fall within the twenty-five to thirty-five age bracket. The material gives two performers an equal opportunity to showcase their classical technique through fast-paced physical and verbal comedy.

    Performance Tips

    Treat the argument over the dogs with absolute life-or-death urgency, as the comedy comes from how seriously both characters take their claims. For Lomov, allow the physical ailments and palpitations to interrupt your thoughts naturally, using them as both an obstacle and a weapon in the argument. For Natalya, emphasize the initial struggle to stay polite before your competitive nature inevitably wins out, ensuring the rapid escalation feels driven by genuine passion rather than mere shouting.

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