Film
monologue
Comedy-Drama
Comedy

The Colonel Sanders of Nicotine

from Thank You For Smoking

Written by Jason Reitman

Thank You For Smoking

Nick Naylor introduces himself as a lobbyist for Big Tobacco, comparing his lethal impact to historical conquerors with cynical pride.

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NICK

Few people on this planet know what it is to be truly despised.

NICK

Can you blame them? I earn a living fronting an organization that kills one thousand two hundred human beings a day. Twelve Hundred People. We’re talking two jumbo jet planeloads a day of men, women, and children. I mean there’s Caesar, Alexander the Great, and me...

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Scene Notes & Audition Tips

5 sections
About This Scene

In "The Colonel Sanders of Nicotine" from the film *Thank You For Smoking*, Nick Naylor delivers a compelling monologue that introduces him as a prominent, yet controversial, figure. As the chief spokesman for a tobacco lobby, Nick candidly outlines his role in an industry responsible for significant loss of life. He embraces his public image with cynical pride, drawing an audacious comparison between himself and historical conquerors, highlighting the sheer scale of impact he attributes to his work.

Character Analysis

Nick Naylor is a character defined by his quick wit, sophisticated charm, and a deeply embedded sense of moral ambiguity. He operates with an almost unflappable confidence, using his intelligence and charisma to defend an indefensible product. Despite the dark nature of his profession, Nick presents himself with a certain suave indifference, suggesting a man who has mastered the art of rhetoric and uses it to detach himself from the ethical implications of his actions. He embodies the anti-hero archetype, making him fascinatingly complex.

Why This Works for Auditions

This monologue is an excellent choice for auditions because it showcases an actor's ability to embody complex, morally grey characters with confidence and sharp delivery. Its "quirky" and "cynical" tone allows for a dynamic performance that can range from wry humor to unsettling self-awareness, making it suitable for actors aiming for leading man roles with an edge. The contemporary setting and executive casting type make it highly versatile for various industry submissions, providing ample opportunity to demonstrate captivating stage presence.

Best Suited For

This monologue is particularly well-suited for male actors in the 35-45 age range who are seeking roles as charming anti-heroes, sophisticated business executives, or leading men with a strong command of language. It effectively highlights an actor's capacity to handle nuanced material and portray characters who are articulate, persuasive, and perhaps a little disquieting. Actors comfortable with satire and dark humor will find this piece allows them to shine, whether for self-tapes, agent showcases, or general practice.

Performance Tips

When approaching this monologue, focus on Nick's unwavering confidence and the underlying satirical tone. While he discusses grim statistics, deliver the lines with a sense of practiced ease and an almost performative pride, rather than genuine malice. Explore the contrast between his charming demeanor and the controversial nature of his profession, allowing his intelligence and wit to drive the performance. Pay attention to pacing, using pauses and subtle shifts in vocal inflection to underscore his cynical bravado and the audacious comparisons he makes.

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