Film
monologue
Comedy

Lebron James — Because you don’t want a baby mama

from Trainwreck

Written by Amy Schumer

Trainwreck

LeBron James gives his friend a hyperbolic and rhythmic warning about the financial and personal risks of having a child with the wrong woman.

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LEBRON JAMES

Because you don’t want a baby mama. Next thing you know you’re paying for her Ferrari, a mansion. She’s gonna want to start a jumpsuit line and you’re gonna have to pay for it. Do you wanna go through that? Convince one of your friends to say he’s the dad and raise the child. Who wants to go through that? Kid ends up being six seven, your…

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Scene Notes & Audition Tips

5 sections
About This Scene

This comedic monologue features LeBron James delivering earnest, if exaggerated, relationship advice to a friend. Set in a contemporary period, the speech revolves around the financial and personal pitfalls of having a child with "the wrong woman." The character articulates a series of escalating, humorous scenarios, vividly illustrating his concerns with rapid-fire examples and a distinctive rhythmic delivery.

Character Analysis

LeBron James, as portrayed in this scene, is a well-meaning but comically over-the-top friend who genuinely believes he is imparting crucial wisdom. His character is grounded in the celebrity persona, allowing for an element of self-awareness within the humor, but he also embodies a universal "best friend" archetype. The character's motivation stems from a desire to protect his friend from perceived future financial and emotional entanglements, expressing his fears through hyperbolic scenarios.

Why This Works for Auditions

This monologue is an excellent choice for auditions because it showcases an actor's ability to handle rapid-fire comedic timing and a heightened, energetic delivery. The contemporary, relatable themes of relationships and advice, even when presented hyperbolically, resonate with casting directors seeking authentic performances. Its brisk duration of approximately one minute makes it ideal for self-tapes and agent showcases where conciseness and impact are crucial.

Best Suited For

This scene is particularly well-suited for male actors in the 25-35 age range who are looking to highlight their comedic chops. It's perfect for those seeking roles in the "Comic Relief," "Best Friend," or "Everyman" casting types, especially actors who can embody a confident yet slightly absurd advisor. Performers comfortable with a quick pace and a strong point of view will find this piece allows them to shine.

Performance Tips

When performing this monologue, focus on building the energy and rhythm as LeBron's advice progresses, allowing the absurd examples to gain momentum. Pay close attention to the specificity of his warnings, using vocal inflection and physical comedy to underscore the humor in each outlandish scenario. Ground the performance in the character's genuine concern for his friend, even as the advice becomes increasingly ridiculous, to ensure the comedy lands effectively.

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