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group
Comedy
4 Characters

The Swimming Pool Confrontation

from Outnumbered

Written by Andy Hamilton, Guy Jenkin

A father gets into an increasingly absurd and public argument with another parent at a swimming gala after being baselessly accused of suspicious behavior. The situation escalates into a shouting match involving Jimmy Savile and social commentary, much to the embarrassment of his daughter who is watching from the pool.

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DAD

Do you know what? I really resent the suggestion that I might be some kind of paedophile.

POLL

Well you could be a paedophile.

SUPERVISOR

Gentlemen, perhaps we could move this discussion into my office.

POLL

Listen, mate, to be a paedophile you don’t have to look like a paedophile.

DAD

I’ve been CRB checked, I’m –

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Scene Notes & Audition Tips

5 sections
About This Scene

This scene, "The Swimming Pool Confrontation," is a masterclass in escalating absurdity within a public setting. It features a father, Dad, attempting to navigate a baseless accusation of suspicious behavior at a swimming gala, leading to a farcical and increasingly out-of-control argument. The comedic brilliance lies in the rapid-fire dialogue and the father's desperate, yet ultimately self-sabotaging, attempts to defend himself against increasingly outlandish claims, all while his daughter watches, mortified.

Character Analysis

Dad is an Everyman figure thrust into a ridiculous and mortifying situation, struggling to maintain his composure and reputation. His initial indignation quickly gives way to a desperate attempt to reason with Poll, leading him down a rabbit hole of increasingly inappropriate comparisons and self-incriminating humor. Poll is a confrontational and judgmental parent, quick to accuse and slow to listen, embodying a narrow-minded authority figure. The Supervisor is a weary, exasperated professional, constantly battling the tide of public disputes, representing the long-suffering working class trying to maintain order. Karen, Dad's daughter, is the innocent bystander, experiencing profound embarrassment and highlighting the very public nature of her father's disastrous confrontation.

Why This Works for Auditions

This scene is an excellent choice for auditions due to its immediate conflict and clear character objectives. It offers a fantastic opportunity for an actor to showcase their comedic timing, ability to handle fast-paced dialogue, and range in portraying frustration, indignation, and ultimately, self-deprecating humor. The public setting and the presence of multiple characters provide ample opportunity for dynamic interactions and strong choices in playing off of others, even in a self-tape.

Best Suited For

This scene is ideally suited for male actors in the 40s-60s age range who excel at comedic roles, particularly those with a knack for British humor and satire. It's perfect for actors looking to embody an Everyman or Parent type, demonstrating nuanced reactions to absurd situations. The confrontational nature makes it suitable for showcasing energy and quick wit, and it's particularly effective for self-tapes where an actor needs to grab attention quickly.

Performance Tips

When approaching this scene, focus on the escalating stakes for your character, Dad. Begin with genuine disbelief and indignation, allowing the absurdity of Poll's accusations to fuel your reactions. Lean into the fast-paced nature of the dialogue, ensuring your lines have momentum, even when interrupted. Don't be afraid to embrace the physical comedy inherent in the situation—the public embarrassment and the sheer ridiculousness of the argument. For Poll, play the intense, unwavering conviction of someone who believes they are entirely in the right, regardless of the evidence. For the Supervisor, convey a sense of weary exasperation, barely holding things together.

CharactersDad, Poll, Supervisor, Karen
Duration2:30
Age Range40s-60s
GenderMale
GenreComedy
PeriodContemporary
Formatgroup
SourceOutnumbered
ToneAbsurd, confrontational, farcical
AccentBritish
Suitable Foragent showcase, self tape, general practice
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