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    Film
    duologue
    Comedy-Drama

    Linda and Her Therapist on the Hole in the Ceiling

    from If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

    Written by Mary Bronstein

    If I Had Legs I'd Kick You

    During a tense session, Linda confronts her therapist about his lack of boundaries and her frustration with a collapsing ceiling and family stress.

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    Scene PreviewExcerpt — subscribe to read full scene

    LINDA

    They aren’t doing what they should be doing with the ceiling and it has been two months since the fucking thing came down! Every time I go check it looks worse and I have no control.

    THERAPIST

    Well it’s not your job to be in control over it, is it? It’s the landlord’s job, right?

    LINDA

    According to Charles it is my job. I just-- I can’t stay at…

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    Scene Notes & Audition Tips

    5 sections
    About This Scene

    Written by Mary Bronstein, this contemporary comedy-drama duologue from the film If I Had Legs I'd Kick You captures an intimate and fractured therapy session. Lying in the fetal position on a couch against the hum of a white noise machine, Linda spirals over an unaddressed collapsing ceiling, displaced living conditions in a hotel, and mounting domestic isolation. What begins as an airing of domestic grievances quickly escalates into a pointed confrontation regarding professional boundaries, support, and attentiveness.

    Character Analysis

    Linda is an intense, vulnerable individual pushed to her emotional brink by circumstances entirely beyond her control. Her speech is urgent and laced with dark humor, masking a desperate longing to feel heard while managing familial pressures in isolation. The Therapist represents a measured authority figure who maintains strict clinical detachment through calculated questions and deliberate pauses. Their dynamic hinges on Linda's need for validation clashing directly against the clinician's refusal to offer easy solutions or overstep boundaries.

    Why This Works for Auditions

    This duologue offers actors a brilliant showcase for navigating dark comedic undertones alongside authentic, high-stakes vulnerability. It avoids melodramatic cliches by anchoring extreme emotional distress in specific, tangible frustrations like home repairs, noise, and sleeplessness. Casting directors will appreciate the rhythm of the dialogue, which demands active listening, nuanced emotional subtext, and the ability to hold tension during extended moments of stillness.

    Best Suited For

    This scene is best suited for actors in their mid-thirties to mid-forties looking to showcase intense, working-class, or character-driven casting profiles. Performers targeting roles that require raw, unpolished distress will find Linda deeply rewarding, while actors suited for understated authority figures can showcase their command through the Therapist. It translates cleanly to self-tapes, general practice, and industry agent showcases.

    Performance Tips

    Avoid playing Linda with one-note aggression; root her irritation in physical fatigue, sleep deprivation, and genuine helplessness. For the Therapist, ensure that every silence carries weight and analytical focus rather than simple disinterest. Keep the physical staging intentional, allowing the physical distance and lack of eye contact to amplify the psychological divide between both characters.

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